My sister and I recently had a lovely chat about music and its important role in the lives of people with dementia. She told me about the amazing story of Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga.
Tony Bennett was first diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2016. By then, Lady Gaga had become Tony’s devoted protégé. Even after his diagnosis, they were still singing together. In 2021, they performed two sold-out concerts “One Last Time: An Evening With Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga.” The limiting and muting effects of Alzheimer’s seemed to disappear while he was singing. Tony Bennett died in 2021 at the age of 96 – seven years after being diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.
Music acts like medicine
Music does seem to have a medicinal quality to it. There are no side effects and it’s difficult to overdose on. The most wonderful thing about music is that you don’t have to be a super-talented singer for it to have a positive effect on your life.
My Mama fell into that category- she loved to sing. As her memories fell away, we tried to focus on what remained. Music endured. Wonderfully, music was the one constant. Mama had songs from a lifetime of singing. In spite of dementia’s relentless destruction of her memories, Mama continued to sing. Even when she stopped talking, she could still be persuaded to sing with me. We always began with her favorite song, “My Wild Irish Rose”. It would take some coaxing, but we’d sing it two or three times, and her voice would grow stronger each time. Then came the day when she could no longer sing. That’s when I sang the songs for her.
Powerful effects of music
I recently had the joy of witnessing the powerful effect music can have on someone. We were at a Senior Center playing Motown Bingo (Instead of using numbers, each square has the title of a well-known Motown song. The person choosing the song plays it until someone calls out its name. If that title is on your card, you mark it). The person leading a recent game began playing a song. As soon as it began, she started singing and swaying with the music, and the expression on her face radiated pure joy. After the song was over, she explained that when she was a teenager, every Saturday night, her Mama would set the radio to a station that played old Motown music. So, when she played one of those old tunes for bingo, it took her back to those special times.
According to K2Medical Research, “Music is a powerful memory cue. Hearing a song that carries importance in your life, from a wedding or a prom, elicits this entire memory. Research shows this remains true even when a neurodegenerative disease takes hold. Many people with Alzheimer’s may struggle to remember recent events or conversations. They may forget the names of loved ones. But despite these impairments, remarkably, they are often still able to tap into musical memories long after other types of memories fade.”
Music enhances learning
During our season of caring for my Mama, I discovered another unexpected feature of singing. One day, while Mama and I were in the car, I began singing, “This is the day that the Lord has made”. We sang it through a few times. On impulse, I added a bum, bum to the end of the song. When we sang it through the next time, Mama added the bum, bum to the end of the song as well – and every time thereafter. I was thrilled! At that moment, dementia didn’t win. Mama had the victory of learning and remembering something.
The Global Council on Brain Health published a report, Music on Our Minds: The Rich Potential of Music to Promote Brain Health and Mental Well-Being. Their report also includes some Practical Tips on how to incorporate music into your, or your loved one’s world.
Musical Heart Sounds
What are your ‘heart sounds’? If possible, take a few minutes and make a list of 5-10 songs. Play and sing or recite them. Share with family members and loved ones. Be sure to find out what their heart sounds are as well. If you don’t know, the BBC offers some possible help from BBC Music Memories.
Other musical options
If your loved one isn’t into music, what type of audibles stirred their hearts during their formative years? Poetry? Jingles from commercials or theme songs from favorite TV shows, passionate speeches?
Music is so powerful, an article by Northwestern Medicine compares it to medication in ‘Music as Medicine for Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia’.
The bottom line is old or young, sharp as a tack, or experiencing advanced Alzheimer’s, and everywhere in between – or none at all. Music benefits everyone.
Has your world been touched by dementia?
My book, “Finishing Well: Finding the Joy in Dementia“, is a collection of stories and tips about doing life with my Mama. May it encourage and inspire you to find joy on your own, unique journey.