Great starts are easy, the goal is to finish well
tually, it was two letters inside one envelope. One was written to Uncle Wayne, and the other to Aunt Yaya. She had written to say how much fun she had spending time with us and wanted us to come back soon for another visit. Even though over the past year, we have received our share of mail – mostly bills and junk, some letters, I must say that hers was one of the highlights.
When the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s Eve, you will likely hear the song “Auld Lang Syne”.
According to my friend ‘AI’, “Auld Lang Syne” is a Scots phrase meaning “old long since,” or more idiomatically, “for old times’ sake,” or “times gone by,” a nostalgic reflection on cherished friendships and shared past experiences, famously penned by Robert Burns for New Year’s Eve to remember old acquaintances and shared joys.
Dictionary.com adds: The first lyrics, “Should auld acquaintance be forgot / And never brought to mind?” is a rhetorical question of whether you should forget about your old friends (which is not recommended). It goes on to talk about reminiscing “for auld lang syne” or for fond memories of old times.
I am excited about this month’s post. I had the wonderful opportunity to learn the story of a dear friend, Arlene Winslow. We met many years ago when she opened her home to a bunch of writers to gather, exchange ideas, and encourage one another.
At that time, Arlene was writing her memoirs based on letters sent back and forth between her and family members while living in Quito, Ecuador. We became close and remained good friends even after I moved across the country to be near grandchildren.
As I became acquainted with Arlene’s stories about her time living in Puerto Rico and Ecuador, along with her incredible artistic talents, I realized that her story needed to be shared. Sit back, relax, and meet my good friend and ‘Silver Star’, Arlene Winslow.
giving challenges when caring for Mama was her diet. She was generally easy-going and would be willing to eat whatever was placed in front of her. The challenge was in her ability to eat the food. In the early stages of dementia, she had no difficulty handling a spoon or fork. Over time, however, Mama came to prefer her fingers for transporting food to her mouth. We would try to gently encourage her to use a fork or spoon by handing one to her. Sometimes that worked.
ny resources available at the time, so we decided to see what would make her happy. We began by creating a space for her to be helpful in areas where she was still able to participate.
For example, Mama loved to fold towels. She had a specific way she wanted them folded (a trait that she passed on to me). I found that if I handed Mama a small load of warm towels from the dryer while she was sitting on the couch, she would begin folding them. It didn’t take too long before she had a nice stack of folded towels. Even after she lost the meaning of the words, “fold towels”, I could simply hand them to her, and her muscle memory would take over, and she would fold them.
Not long ago, a friend of ours confided in us that his mother was facing dementia. Our friend is a very private person. We recognized the trust he placed in us, took it as an honor, and said we would include his mother and family in our prayers.
Recently, his mother passed away. Our friend sent us a letter his sister, Laura K, had written and shared at their mother’s memorial service. It was full of honesty and hope, and he invited us to share her story and insights. By sharing this story, we hope to honor not only one family’s journey but the countless others who walk similar paths.
I have always thought I was fairly strong. I’ve been active all my life, with very few obstacles to walking, swimming, or other types of exercises. So it came as a surprise when my DEXA Scan showed that I have osteopenia. Both of my parents and my sister had hip surgery, so it shouldn’t have been a total surprise.
It was time to modify my lifestyle, so I began making a few changes in my exercise routine and diet. It is a process. And more successfully done as a family, so I recruited Wayne’s help, and we began to look for ways to increase our calcium intake.
Since ancient times, people have recognized the value of cleaning their teeth.
The ancient Egyptians even recorded practices of teeth cleaning. They created toothpaste using vinegar, crushed pumice stone, egg, and oyster shells. The Greeks and Romans continued the practice of using abrasive materials like crushed bones and shells as a way to clean their teeth. The Persians added gypsum, herbs, and honey to their mixtures. This was well before the toothbrush had even been invented. People used small twigs and bamboo to create their toothbrushes.
While my Daddy was still alive, my parents lived in a little cottage on several acres in the country. They loved living independently, but over time they began to need more and more help in order to remain ‘independent’. My sister, husband, and I made multiple trips daily out to their place to bring meals, dispense medicine, clean, and even a few fun things, which included singing, snacking, and reminiscing.
Caregiving for someone with dementia is neither easy nor for the faint of heart. It is certainly not a laughing matter – it’s a serious responsibility filled with many decisions and little sleep. It was almost 20 years ago when it was determined that my Mama had dementia. Back then, there were very few resources or books that offered advice about how to do day-to-day care. After our Daddy passed away, my sister, husband, and I realized we had to figure out how to navigate this journey with very few signposts along the way.